Ringgren

The ties you make in life are important to your growth. However, if it is no longer inspiring positivity, make sure to untie yourself from that connection. It will only hold you back if you let it.

The window to the terrace is open to let the breeze fill my room. The melodious Sam Smith, is filling me with wanting feelings. His voice so tangible with pain, that I feel breathless. I can't feel my fingers, as they grip my sheets in anger. Feeling overwhelmed. The pressure in my head, is threatening to kill my sanity. Don't let this be the end. The moon is gleaming patiently, over the sleeping city. Tomorrow is another day, filled with longing looks and sighs. Wanting to give you that missing piece, the one you've waited for. Please don't break my heart, it's fragile and it's yours. I don't trust myself enough, to stop me from falling. All it takes is a breath from your lips, and I crumble, down, down down. I want to lay with you in the sand, entwining my legs with yours. Breathe that warm scent of skin, that only the July sun can bring. My feelings are not yours to take, but mine to give. I am fragile.

The butterflies above her head, remind her of fairies. She prays every night for wings. I have not the heart to tell her they're not real. I see her beautiful eyes, begging for an answer.  I catch myself, before a white lie escapes. It will only confuse her. She is five, an impressionable age. I want to protect her, from disappointments, the wonderful fantasies. She falls asleep, I hear her silent breaths, praying for the fairies to come. Even in dreams, she wishes to fly away. She is my family, and I treasure her. If I could magically grant her wishes, she would be taking flight. For now, I'll dream with her.

I didn't find an answer to your question. I wish I could give you the truth, if it could spill easily from my soul. But it won't. I don't work that way. The walls of the chambers of my heart are not easily affected. They are tough, hardened, from continual abuse. The walls protect my essence. What there's left of it. I treasure those last pieces and I cannot let them be compromised. I wish I could give you an honest answer. I hope you will wait for it. I cannot promise it will be quickly, or without work. But I feel confident in saying, that it will be worth it. Remember when you looked into my eyes last summer and told me you loved me? That moment is in there, held in a special place where the sun shines as it did on that day. You didn't expect anything in return. Patience, something I've always felt I was lacking, has come to me in spades since I met you. I will fight for this. **fictional piece**

Surface. You blinded me. A shiny portal, into your lies. It felt safe and real. I was not the first, I would never be the last. You need to manipulate, to forget about your past. Patience will be my fortitude.

Downing another shot, drowning another dream. Her mind spinning circles,  of tales once forgotten. Angry screams, her spine shivers with fear. Because there once was a man, who whispered lies into her ear. Ripping into her soul, the nightmares keep coming. Sheets soaking wet, but she's supposed to be safe here. Rising from the torment, she moves around in a daze. Sipping that third drink,  while the enemy is in her head. The sweet release of morning, she sees the sunrise coming. The horizon a golden promise, of nightmares soon forgotten.